Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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