I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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