I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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