I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize