i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
