dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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