ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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