3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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