Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
True strength comes from lack of pants
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
