i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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