I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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