By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
