I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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