what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
