i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize