you guys were way drunker than both of me
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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