It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
