I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
