Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
