i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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