She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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