I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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