nut hugger
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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