ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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