In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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