Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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