That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
