So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
