Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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