at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
