Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
