This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
