Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
