super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize