We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
