I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
