Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
