i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
