Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
