Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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