it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize