When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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