Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
