he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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