Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
