too bad you live with your parents still
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
