i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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