'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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