IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
