i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
